JEEVAN KI KUCH SACH BAATE

खूब सूरत तस्वीरें नेगेटिव से तैयार होती है
और वो भी अँधेरे कमरे में ,
इसलिए जब भी आपके जीवन में अन्धकार नजर आये,
तो समझ लीजियेगा की ईश्वर आपके
भविष्य की सुन्दर सी तस्वीर का निर्माण कर रहा है

दुःख में भगवान को याद करने का हक़
उसी को होता है .......
जिसने सुख में उसका सुक्रिया
अदा किया होता है …… !

जीवन मिलना भाग्य की बात है ।
मृत्यु होना समय की बात है…।
पैर मृत्यु के बाद भी;
लोगो के दिलो में जीवित रहना,
ये "कर्मो " की बात है....

सवयं में बहुत सी कमियों के बावजूद
अगर मैं सवयं से प्रेम  कर सकता हु
तो फिर दुसरो में थोड़ी बहुत कमियों की वजह
से उनसे घृणा कैसे कर सकता हु 

What Is the Difference Between Falling in Love and Physical Attraction?

Brain in Lust

Lust refers to the desire for sexual gratification, and is primarily driven by high levels of the hormones estrogen and androgen, says Fisher. While lust is necessary to initiate the pursuit of a mate, it is not always followed by the process of falling in love, nor is lust always directed exclusively at the object of a person’s love. According to Fisher, people may feel a sex drive response to any individuals other than those they are romantically attracted to. On the other hand, she also warns that engaging in sex can initiate the mechanisms that fuel attachment whether two lustful individuals intend a long term relationship or not, as the hormones secreted during sexual intercourse stimulate the drive for romantic bonding and closeness.

Motivators for Lust

Fisher believes that the neural circuitry associated with lust evolved as a biological motivator for people to pursue any genetically compatible partner at all to mate with. In males, the sex drive is more constant and heavily influenced by visuals, while the female sex drive is more intense and greatly stimulated by romantic words and fictional images.

Brain Falling in Love

Falling in love, or the second stage of love which Fisher refers to as attraction, is primarily driven by high levels of dopamine and heightened activity in the brain’s caudate nucleus. The caudate nucleus is regarded as the brain’s reward system, which indicates that love is not so much an emotion as it is a motivational drive, compelling people to seek the affections of a particular partner. The presence of dopamine in the brain is associated with new environments and highly focused attention -- which is why falling in love is characterized by euphoric, exhilarated, energetic, anxious, sleepless, obsessive states of mind for the enamored individuals concerned. The same elevated hormones, neural circuitry and states of mind associated with falling in love are also associated with cocaine abusers. However, by the time couples arrive at love’s third and final stage, attachment, new hormones -- oxytocin and vasopressin -- take over the process and the obsessive elation calms.

Motivators for Love

Fisher believes that the neural circuitry associated with falling in love evolved as a biological force to lead romantic partners to exclude other love interests and conserve time and energy required for mating by directing it toward a specific genetically-suitable individual until offspring have been conceived. Men’s attractions tend to stem more from physical appearance, while women are more likely to find themselves attracted to men based on financial, educational, occupational and financial status. Unlike unions driven by lust, Fisher found that people actually falling in love view sex as secondary to other factors defining their relationship, with 64 percent of respondents reporting they disagreed that sex was the most important part of their relationships.

झूठा प्रेम

 जिससे जितना प्यार करोगे उससे उतना ज्यादा नफ़रत भी करोगे। और आपने अभी ये भी बोला कि एक बेटी है, उसका पिता उससे बहुत ज्य़ादा प्यार करता है, यदि वो भाग जाएगी तो उसको मार भी डालेगा। लेकिन वो प्यार नहीं है। क्यों सर?

हमारा प्रेम ऐसा ही है। देखो दो चीज़ें हैं- एक तो ये कि वास्तव में प्रेम क्या है और दूसरा ये कि हमने किसको प्रेम का नाम दे रखा है।

हमने सब झूठी चीज़ों को प्रेम का नाम दे दिया है।

मुझे तुमसे एक आकर्षण हो गया क्योंकि मेरी एक ख़ास उम्र है और तुम्हारी भी एक ख़ास उम्र है, और इस उम्र में शरीर की ग्रंथियाँ सक्रिय हो जाती हैं। सीधे-सीधे ये एक शारीरिक आकर्षण है, यौन आकर्षण है।

मैं इसको क्या नाम दे देता हूँ? मैं बोल दूंगा कि ये प्रेम है। क्या ये प्रेम है? पर नाम हम इसे प्रेम का ही देंगे। अभी बीता था वैलेंटाइन्स डे। तो प्रेम है।

प्रेम है क्या? क्या वास्तव में प्रेम है?

अगर प्रेम है तो यही प्रेम आठ की उम्र में क्यों नहीं हुआ? इसलिए नहीं हुआ क्योंकि तुम्हारी ग्रंथियाँ ही सक्रिय नहीं थीं, तब तुम्हारी ये शारीरिक ग्रंथियाँ सक्रिय नहीं थीं, यौन ग्रंथियाँ। अब सक्रिय हैं।

इसी तरीक़े से जब बच्चा पैदा होता है, माँ का उससे मोह है। उस मोह को ‘ममता’ का नाम दिया जाता है। ‘मम’ शब्द का अर्थ समझते हो? ‘मम’ माने मेरा। ममता का अर्थ भी प्रेम कतई नहीं है, ममता का अर्थ है चीज़ मेरी है इसलिए मुझे पसंद है। पर हम उसे क्या नाम दे देते हैं? हम कह देते हैं माँ का बेटे से प्रेम है। वो प्रेम नहीं है, वही बच्चा जिससे आज उसको इतनी ममता है, छह महीने बाद पता चले कि बच्चा अस्पताल में बदल गया था तो क्या करेगी वो? इसी बच्चे को उठा कर के कहेगी कि मेरा बच्चा बदल कर लाओ। होगा के नहीं होगा? क्या ऐसा नहीं होता? छह महीने बाद अगर माँ को पता चले बच्चा बदल गया था तो क्या इसी को रखे रहेगी या अपने वाले को ले आयेगी? अगर वो मिल जायेगा तो उसको को ले आयेगी।

BEHAVIOUR

"Always be good with the good but Never be bad with the bad because you can’t wash mud with mud" Its reality if u can understand."

"Behavior" Is A Mirror In Which Everyone, Displays His Own Image Always Try To Build Your Respectable Image Because Reflection Can’t Be Changed By Changing The Mirror."

 

Don’t bully yourself!

Don’t hold yourself to standards that you wouldn’t expect others to meet. It’s great to want to do well, but expecting yourself to be better than the best and then punishing yourself when you fail is a vicious cycle. Using expressions like “I should have” is just a way of punishing yourself after the fact. Stop it. Live in the present and move forward. Don’t drag the past along for the ride; it gets heavy. Do you remember the children’s story of the little train that could? That’s how you need to live your life. Keep saying to yourself, “I know I can ... I know I can ... I can ... I can!” Tell your subconscious you’ve already done it. Be kind to yourself and remember you can do this!

Be kind to yourself.

People often feel perfectly comfortable treating themselves in ways they wouldn’t consider treating others. Do you call yourself names like fat, ugly and loser? Would you use those terms to describe a friend? Remind yourself that you deserve to be treated well. Do something nice for yourself sometimes, either in thought (give yourself a compliment) or action (treat yourself to a massage).

Encourage yourself.

Instead of focusing on the negative, replace your criticism with encouragement. Give constructive suggestions instead of being critical. (“Maybe if I try to do ____ next time, it would be even better,” instead of “I didn’t do that right.”) Compliment yourself and those around you on what you’ve achieved. (“Well, we may not have done it all, but we did a pretty great job with what we did.”) Giving praise will also encourage others to praise you, and this builds up your confidence to continue on the path.

Avoid absolutes and exaggerations.

Correct your internal voice when it exaggerates, especially when it exaggerates the negative: “I always eat too much” or “I’ll never lose weight.” These are absolutes, meaning they’re always 100 percent true, but there are very few absolutes in life. If you exaggerate or use an absolute, rephrase what you say. For example, “I always eat too much” can be changed to, “In the past, I’ve often eaten too much. Now, I’m getting better at how much I eat.” Then feel good about taking control of your thoughts.

CARING

“If you shift your focus from yourself to others, extend your concern to others, and cultivate the thought of caring for the well being of others, then this will have the immediate effect of opening up your life and helping you to reach out.”

“Many of us follow the commandment 'Love One Another.' When it relates to caregiving, we must love one another with boundaries. We must acknowledge that we are included in the 'Love One Another.”